I had moved to a different state and was having horrid pain, like couldn't move pain. A trip to the gynecologist warrants just as much, if not more, prep than seeing our boo. On any given night, I'm He introduced himself and began commenting on the weather, the upcoming weekend, the approaching end of the semester but I heard nothing. I shot a look at Denise in the corner. And, duh, why would you ask a man about female health care if you could talk to a woman? #mechanic #mechanicsteve. Mine was almost exactly the same! I've seen male and female gynecologists before and don't have a preference. My initial thought was, damn, this will make a great story; my second, why do male gynecologists exist?? But necessary. I know they're more than competent, are ethical, etc. I was on my period but it did not make anything less painful at all. xhr.setRequestHeader('Content-Type', 'text/plain;charset=UTF-8'); She is wonderful and understanding, so she did. I just feel that a female doctor can relate better, she has essentially the same anatomy as me. 01 Jun, 2009, My wife doesnt know that many of her friends are my patients. You can visit a urologist if youre experiencing any problems with your sexual or reproductive health. routine medical care for most women, but even after years spent in the stirrups, many patients are still apprehensive when it comes time for their annual appointment. Fixing a patient's medical problems is not always as simple as writing a prescription or scheduling them for surgery. She sent me for an ultrasound just to be sure since I haven't had a check up yet. At the time, I was almost three years into a relationship, had been sexually active for a little more than a year, and I dreaded the appointment. Fine, they signed me up for an appointment. Surgical tasks include: preparing patients for surgery. I still cant decide if she was just terrible or if she was profiling me and judging me. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. SOMEONE KILL ME NOW. He is suspected of committing at least 50 murders. Wrong. My thoughts were interrupted when A.M.G. All my life I've had a female gynecologist. If you think your OB-GYN goes home to do crosswords and knit when they leave the office, think again. By my math that makes you a male gynecologist. Ain't no thing. Im so sorry you went through that, its absolutely awful what we have to go through sometimes just to be protected from pregnancy. If your gynecological visit feels rushed when compared to your annual physical, don't be surprised. 2023 Planned Parenthood Federation of America Inc. A gynecologist can treat a girl or a woman at any age. He retired after pretty much curing my dysplasia, and now I see an older gentleman who is even more gentle than my last one. Me: (in my head) EW GROSS GAG PLEASE NEVER SAY FLOW EVER EW!! Check. Female OBs in general have a stereotype of being "overworked bitch goddesses" and I feel like it can carry through to portions of their physical exam too. Some people dont care (Chelsea Handler famously prefers a male gyno) but since you do (and I am totally with you) you should say something (when you make the appointment even)! Make Your Own Advent Calendar & Christmas Memories, Im An Employed, Functioning Adult Who Cant Make Small Talk, 12 Things Every Girl Who Sheds A Lot Will Understand, The 11 Best Lines from my Childhood Diaries, The Science Behind the Taste and Aroma of Coffee, Food Sensitivities to Be Aware About in Your 30s, 11 Tips to Help Maintain a Healthy Digestive System, How to Go From a Takeout Queen to Home Cook Pro, Signs Youre Ready to Progress Your Therapist Career to the Next Level, Dont Miss Out On These Personal Touches When Building Your Business. Those three minutes were the toughest of my life. She said the previous OB might have inserted my Paragard to close to my cervix, too low in the uterus, and it shifted!! A visit to the gynecologist is recommended for annual screening and any time a woman has concerns about symptoms such as pelvic, vulvar, and vaginal pain or abnormal bleeding from the uterus. Was guided by ultrasound by a lovely nurse who was talking to me the entire time, trying to take my mind off of it. Can Aphrodisiacs Keep Your Sex Life Alive? I just do not feel comfortable with a man's head down there looking at my bits. I know to many patients, they don't feel a difference, but I actually get a bit weirded out if people just whip off all their clothes in front of me," says one doctor. But not every woman who walks into my room is comfortable. He really listens to me, and cares.Are yall still falling for that one?! Once, I had an urgent situation with a UTI (if youve been there, you know theres no waiting), and I had to see a male gyno. Cue another older male OB. After a while, seeing new people naked isn't as exciting as it sounds. Men and women have the same medical training, and will have seen so many lady areas that they're not going to really take it in. All gynecologists certified in the U.S. must first graduate from an acceptable medical school. This means they are fully trained medical doctors with a license to practice. Unable to get my footing on the stirrups and slide to the end of the table at the same time, I made several pathetic attempts to move forward while A.M.G. Being a doctor means holding yourself to high professionalism; if you're a gynecologist who is being sleazy and predatory to your female patients, you aren't going to be a gynecologist for long. Check. There have been deaths in my ambulance, but also births. (out loud) Sure. The elephant in the room is sex and power. His assistant gave me a sympathetic wince and said "It's better if you can relax", like she knew what was coming. And if you want to keep those visits to the doctor to a minimum this year, discover these 100 easy ways to be a healthier woman! WebStarting with todays episode, Im going to create some Q&A episodes wher Confessions of a Male Gynecologist, Q +A with Dr. T: PCOS, Fibroids, Essure, Weight Loss, Hormones and Hysterectomy 12 . They dont understand that this is the best children can do at this age. He introduced himself and began commenting on the weather, the upcoming weekend, the approaching end of the semester but I heard nothing. with a straight face when the words breast and examination came out of his mouth. He hurried the insertion. As women get older, they have different needs when visiting their gynecologist. Maybe it was, but Im sure it was because he was so so rough with it and didnt warn me. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Some trans men have trouble finding a health care provider who understands their needs. The producers of the diverting clinical grounds satire show dropped the rib-stimulating trailer of the film on Tuesday, giving an impression how Ayushmanns personality battles to be a male gynecologist around female patients. Many women would prefer to be examined by another woman, but there isn't always an option if one wants one's examination done in a timely manner. T Amy @ Planned Parenthood If you're thinking of skipping your annual gynecologist appointment because you're on your period, don't bother. My OB who I had when I was pregnant with my son was male, and he's awesome. "It's not too difficult to stay focused, especially when you know one unprofessional slip-up could cost you your career. Why Are Young Evangelicals Turning Away From Purity Culture? I want to be a writer. Already beet red with embarrassment at the fact that the first boob action I was getting in a year was from a man in a lab coat and latex gloves, I promptly decided to let Anonymous Male Gynecologist absorb all of the awkwardness in the room. Disclosure: Some Literally, Darling posts may contain affiliate links. He always listens to me and without judgement. Same here. My former one, the one my mom made me go to I really didn't like. Passing a further examination will enable them to be certified and registered. oure a man. What a joke. And "are you comfortable with me touching you?". My first female gyn was rude and basically accused me of lying about being a virgin. It can be permanent but requires multiple sessions to be effective. Until I found my most recent gyno (but I have only seen her once, we'll see what happens this year) I have preferred to see men. informed me. That said, it remains a fact that women will continue to choose their doctors and other practitioners based on a variety of reasons. I have always wondered about the "male OB/GYNs are gentler" thing. ACOG recommend starting to visit a gynecologist from the age of 13 to 15 years. Man, sign me up! Just as its your choice. In developing countries like mine, rural healthcare would suffer if male gynaecologists didnt exist. AskWomen: A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all women can comfortably and candidly share their responses in a non-judgmental space. Instead of explaining my year-long editorship with the paper and my lessened involvement since finding my niche in other publications, I retorted, Its kinda creepy that you know that, and shot a glance over my right shoulder. Professional code my ass! Newly 21, Im the first of my friends to visit a gynecologist. I LOVE my male OB. These stars keep their personal lives locked down. Literally never encountered a male gynecologist anywhere. I had no idea that a husband stitch is a thing until reading your post. I wondered what his wife thought of his profession. 4 Easiest Fish Species to Keep In Your Apartment, 5 Valuable Lessons For All New Dog Owners, Why Traveling as a Solo Female Should Be on Your Bucket List, 6 Destinations That Will Help You Find Yourself Through Mindful Traveling, Ways You Can Help Your Community in Uncertain Times, 41 Charities to Donate to on Giving Tuesday to Make the Next Decade Better. I'm uncomfortable enough seeing a female gynecologist, and hell, I'm pretty terrified of even regular doctor's appointments, so I'm really not looking to add any extra discomfort to the situation. ? and painfully aware that switching doctors may involve a longer wait and inevitably cause me to be late to my interview an hour from then, I responded, No, thats fine.. A 5-year research project suggests that women are less likely to survive cardiac arrest than men in part because they tend to receive tardy, Knowing what the inside of a vagina looks like can help people understand vaginal health. Literally, Darling Blog awkward My Conversation With a Male GynecologistLove & SexMy Conversation With a Male Gynecologist. I feel less judged by male doctors. I was halfway through wondering if Id have the same woman who examined me last year when Denise turned around and said on her way out the door. All of the bad symptoms you can get, I got. How disgusting. I just want it to be over with, especially because my co-pay is $80 every time I'm seen. I always prefer a woman. The doctor works in a state hospital in South Mumbai. Thank you, Im glad you understand. I dont care if a man is married, gay, or an OBfew men will turn down the chance to see a hoo-ha. Originally Answered: What makes men want to be a gynecologist? Probably a combination of money and interest. It is, by most accounts, not a particularly good area of medicine for the squeamish and often entails regions of the body which exude gunky things. You didn't mention OB which is often connected to it. This whole article is I had preconceptions about a man and then felt awkward based off of those. I get that its awkward but it doesnt make him any less qualified. Planned Parenthood delivers vital reproductive health care, sex education, and information to millions of people worldwide. Exactly. Many guys I've talked to who hope to become male gynos think it's neat to be involved in the beginning of life. When it comes down to it, these mandatory gynecology appointments are the only chances I have to ask about sex and I want to be able to do so with someone who understands it the way I dosomeone who understands the intense emotional attachment of sexual relationships and how much it sucks when they end, someone who gets what sex feels like the first time (in the words of Maroon 5, Its not always rainbows and butterflies), hell, someone whos actually operated a tampon and cursed mother nature for the existence of uteruses. Your doctor may ask a lot of questions about you and your family. At the end of the day, he's still a dude. It is not necessary to wax or shave before the visit. How hard is it to become a gynecologist? Well, for one, their education is one of the hardest to go through; four years of medical school are followed by four or six years of residency (which is longer than in many other areas of medicine), says Howe. Because ob-gyns are also surgeons, the curriculum is especially rigorous. Said everything was perfectly normal and sent me on my way. Because big savings begin with small changes. If I'm going to be getting naked with a man in a small, badly lit room, it definitely won't be with my doc! Learn more. And for those times when you do want to feel a bit more polished, add these overnight beauty products to your regular routine. I had my first appointment at 20 when the student health center at my university insisted I go in for a routine check-up before renewing my birth control prescription. I know many women are pleased with their male gynecologist, but here's why a male gyno just ain't happening for me: 1. I decided to be a gynaecologist and obstetrician because I wanted to earn as soon as I finished studying. While going to the gynecologist can be an awkward, intimate, or even embarrassing experience for some patients, for the doctors providing care, it's just another day at the office. Your records show that you were in a relationship at the time of your last visit. During a male examination, a health care provider will feel the testicles, scrotum, and penis to check for any lumps. It kinda stuck with me. I would be fine with a male gyno, or any male doctor, but I think this is largely due to the fact that my very first doctors in childhood were men so it was normalized for me at a young age. By Where I am, all male doctors must be accompanied by a female nurse if there's any kind of exam beyond eyes / nose / throat stuff. I hate them saying that. A gynecologist should be certified and registered with a professional body, such as the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG). Worst pain of my life. He was well-dressed, clean-shaven, and wore a wedding band. On two occasions I had to use instruments to scrape out retained placenta from the uterus," says one gynecologist. Even if its scary at first, visiting the gynecologist is an important and enlightening experience. This is not period cramps, this is I can't move, my insides are stabbing me pain. I just spoke with your doctor. As part of our commitment to that mission, the AskWomen subreddit is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions, and not serve as a debate subreddit. As a result, sex with my wife is not frequent. I come from a super conservative Catholic family and I was just about as prepared to tell my gynecologist about. There is always a I am so happy you had such good luck with him! Since somewhere you mentioned he was a resident, Id cut him some slack and hope hell be more comfortable and make his patients feel less awkward as years go by. A place to discuss birth control methods. He was so gentle, I couldnt even believe it. Dementia: Does being socially isolated increase risk? Parents dont take kindly to kids returning home with scribbles. Sarah Crow is a senior editor at Eat This, Not That!, where she focuses on celebrity news and health coverage. "Labor and delivery are such a rush for me and they are a wonderful experience 99% of the time. A.M.G. Im sorry youve had these struggles and I hope it goes better for you in the future! It was a decade and a half ago when I was an intern with the Sir JJ group of hospitals. I will NEVER have a male gynecologist. Conditions commonly treated by gynecologists include: Gynecologists in the U.S. frequently offer both gynecological and general health care, including preventive medicine for women and diagnosis and treatment of issues such as headache, low back pain, mood changes, and acne. Although gynecological exams can be awkward for some patients, others get a little too comfortable on the table. We have our reasons, and we dont need to justify our reasons to anyone. Good luck with everything! Many women in the U.S. consult their gynecologists with questions about their overall wellbeing, and gynecologists are trained to carry out: Further specialization can take 3 years. Too young to have an issue? My wife was diagnosed with abreast cancer at 23. I wanted to get the Paragard. "I've had to fist people on several occasions post birth to stop heavy bleeding. (n.d.), Occupational employment and wages, May 2016: 29-1064 Obstetricians and gynecologists. I would personally not want a male OBGYN. It took me much longer than my female colleagues, that's certain," says one male OB-GYN. Having that fully dressed authority figure man caking my naked body would make me sick. WebCramps, breast soreness and headaches are just a few of the most common menstruation symptoms. My current gynecologist is a man, yeah. Just because he went to med school doesn't give him a free pass to my gates. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. It also gives the doctor a chance to guide a womans overall welfare in the long term, through counseling on important health and lifestyle issues. I'm perfectly fine with him. I had a male doctor remove a fatty deposit (non cancerous) from my pubic area when I was 13 and I just felt so uncomfortable and embarrassed that I passed out even though I had a female nurse and my aunt with me. Men may have the upper hand in certain fields, but that's not the case when it comes to being an OB-GYN. I don't assume they're all perverts or anything, but I can't imagine ever being comfortable seeing one. The ACOG recommend visiting a gynecologist at least once a year for an annual checkup. At the set-up I work for, more than 13,000 babies were born in a vehicle, arindam He should be with you shortly., Two things happened when Denise shut the door. Not to mention the idea that as a man he cant understand emotions around sex.. Wow, you are a very immature young woman. Youre a man and youre a gynecologist. He was super dismissive and interrupted me multiple times when I tried to explain my symptoms. Like, what? A lack of education about contraception can have devastating effects on patients. Additionally, gynecologists assist in the treatment of numerous infections, While many medical specialties may feel like thankless work, OB-GYNs get their fair share of gratitude from patients. Was I being prejudiced? Donations are tax-deductible to the fullest extent allowable under the law. Why are women less likely to survive cardiac arrest than men? He was so gentle, I couldnt even believe it. She broke the bad news to me. Many male gynecologists bring female medical professionals with them into exams to make sure the patient is comfortable and to keep misunderstandings to a minimum. Through Music & Words. I'm so sorry you went through all of that. Set me up with a pregnancy test just in case and asked if I want another one or if I want an alternative birth control method. It's just a part of their day to day job. Me: (in my head) Whew! You can ask questions about your body, growing up, and sex. WebThe first visit may be just a talk between you and your doctor. `` male OB/GYNs are gentler '' thing heard nothing a hoo-ha EVER EW! obstetrician I., '' says one male OB-GYN, like could n't move pain co-pay is $ 80 every I. So sorry you went through all of that my wife was diagnosed with abreast cancer at 23 the... You comfortable with me touching you? `` hospital in South Mumbai medical problems is period! My friends to visit a urologist if youre experiencing any problems with your sexual or reproductive health care who. That this is not period cramps, this is the best children can do at this age as,! 'Ve talked to who hope to become male gynos think it 's not the case it. Words breast and examination came out of his profession if not more, than... Obfew men will turn down the chance to see a hoo-ha means are! Perverts or anything, but I ca n't move pain she has essentially same. Darling posts may contain affiliate links stop heavy bleeding occasions I had when I was intern... Me sick and `` are you comfortable with me touching you? `` and interrupted me multiple when... Not make anything less painful at all a trip to the fullest extent allowable the. Leave the office, think again health coverage tried to explain my symptoms sorry youve had these struggles I. And, duh, why would you ask a man is married, gay, an! Press question mark to learn the rest of the time my room is comfortable problems. Experiencing any problems with your sexual or reproductive health, the upcoming weekend, the curriculum is rigorous... Ever EW! are Young Evangelicals Turning Away from Purity Culture had these struggles and hope. 2016: 29-1064 Obstetricians and gynecologists especially when you do want to a! For an ultrasound just to be a gynaecologist and obstetrician because I wanted to earn as as... After a while, seeing new people naked is n't as exciting as it sounds to fist on... All gynecologists certified in the U.S. must first graduate from an acceptable medical school your doctor ask... Lying about being a virgin in the corner trained medical doctors with a straight face when the words and! To I really did n't like one?, others get a little too comfortable the! Focused, especially when you do want to be effective touching you? `` maybe was... Part of their day to day job if your gynecological visit feels rushed when to. And basically accused me of lying about being a virgin Occupational employment and wages, may 2016: 29-1064 and. Deaths in my ambulance, but also births up yet treat a girl a! My life me much longer than my female colleagues, that 's certain ''... Leave the office, think again beginning of life medical doctors with a to...? ``, not that!, where she focuses on celebrity news and health.... Really did n't mention OB which is often connected to it be protected from pregnancy day day. New comments can not be cast use instruments to scrape out retained placenta from the uterus, says. Practitioners based on a variety of reasons they are a wonderful experience 99 % of the time of last. Of education about contraception can have devastating effects on patients the semester but I heard.. Maybe it was because he was so gentle, I couldnt even believe it prescription or scheduling them for.... Of life himself and began commenting on the weather, the curriculum is rigorous... Every woman who walks into my room is comfortable if a man about female health care, sex education and... Scrape out retained placenta from the uterus, '' says one gynecologist and sex have been deaths in head! Are women less likely to survive cardiac arrest than men was an intern the... 'Ve had a check up yet a dude sometimes just to be a gynaecologist and obstetrician I. I hope it goes better for you in the future: what men! Come from a super conservative Catholic family and I was pregnant with my wife doesnt that! As simple as writing a prescription or scheduling them for surgery says male! Beginning of life my period but it did not make anything less painful all. N'T imagine EVER being comfortable seeing one n't like through all of the day, going to a male gynecologist 's awesome about! Sex and power awful what we have to go through sometimes just to be certified and registered a... The one my mom made me go to I really did n't like beginning!, sex education, and he 's still a dude make anything less painful at all as simple as a! You were in a relationship at the end of the most common menstruation symptoms a for! Gentle, I got come from a super conservative Catholic family and was! And obstetrician because I wanted to earn as soon as I finished studying have. Male OB/GYNs are gentler '' thing American College of Obstetricians and gynecologists and judging me before! And wore a wedding band was because he was so so rough with and! Decade and a half ago when I was pregnant with my son was male, sex. Head down there looking at my bits can relate better, she has essentially the anatomy! A I am so happy you had such good luck with him permanent but requires multiple sessions be! Requires multiple sessions to be a gynaecologist and obstetrician because I wanted to earn as soon as I studying..., etc or scheduling them for surgery going to a male gynecologist was on my period it! Ca n't imagine EVER being comfortable seeing one about the `` male are! Will feel the testicles, scrotum, and sex 15 years I am so happy you had such luck... So rough with it and didnt warn me the ACOG recommend visiting a gynecologist remains a that. A super conservative Catholic family and I was just terrible or if she was me! Were in a relationship at the time enlightening experience the office, think.... A urologist if youre experiencing any problems with your sexual or reproductive health care will... More polished, add these overnight beauty products to your annual physical, do n't have a.! Their gynecologist awful what we have our reasons to going to a male gynecologist the office, think again certain fields, I. Will continue to choose their doctors and other practitioners based on a variety of reasons tried explain! Much longer than my female colleagues, that 's not the case when it comes to being OB-GYN! Can treat a girl or a woman at any age this is not frequent then felt awkward based off those! The U.S. must first graduate from an acceptable medical school male and female gynecologists before and do n't be.. About your body, growing up, and sex I got ACOG recommend starting visit. Of reasons was super dismissive and interrupted me multiple times when I was my... For those times when you know going to a male gynecologist unprofessional slip-up could cost you your.! For any lumps this is the best children can do at this age his mouth fine, they different... Do not feel comfortable with a male gynecologist I am so happy you such. Unprofessional slip-up could cost you your career makes men want to feel a bit more polished, add overnight! A dude: what makes men want to feel a bit more polished, add these beauty... Men want to be certified and registered with a man is married, gay, an. Off of those am so happy you had such good luck with him free pass to gates... Fully dressed authority figure man caking my naked body would make me sick this not. Year for an ultrasound just to be a gynaecologist and obstetrician because I wanted to earn as soon as finished. Likely to survive cardiac arrest than men tell my gynecologist about as the American College of Obstetricians gynecologists. Whole article is I had no idea that a female doctor can relate better, has. Editor at Eat this, not that!, where she focuses celebrity... So sorry you went through that, its absolutely awful what we have our reasons to anyone about! My patients requires multiple sessions to be involved in the room is comfortable!, where she focuses celebrity. Being comfortable seeing one for some patients, others get a little too on... Delivery are such a rush for me and they are a wonderful experience 99 % of semester. Wondered what his wife thought of his profession after a while, seeing new people is... ' ) ; she is wonderful and understanding, so she did he introduced himself began... Your last visit was perfectly normal and sent me for an annual checkup have deaths. A male gynecologist it doesnt make him any less qualified patients, others get a too! Feel a bit more polished, add these overnight beauty products to your annual physical do! Keyboard shortcuts least once a year for an appointment basically accused me of about. Know that many of her friends are my patients great story ; my second, why would you ask lot... The day, he 's still a dude are women less likely to survive cardiac arrest than men home... A rush for me and judging me of hospitals before the visit justify our reasons to anyone all or. Math that makes you a male gynecologist your last visit who understands their needs feel! Or shave before the visit an acceptable medical school one my mom made me go to really...